It’s all in your head (lessons from a rapper)?
Read Time: 5 Minutes
Welcome to Raw Thoughts w/ Riley – where I’ll share unfiltered personal reflections, and insights on my journey to self and life mastery.
Join us every Thursday as we explore bold ideas, lessons, and perspectives designed to spark your curiosity, confidence, and creativity.
Today’s Raw Thoughts:
- Something on my mind: Life lessons from a rapper.
- Something I am learning: It’s all in my head.
- How I recently failed: The past isn’t the present.
- How I recently won: Advice from the man that raised me.
- Story & lesson: Losing my brother (why did I start)
- Q & A: How do I know what decision is right?
Something on my mind: Life lessons from a rapper.
Russell Vitale (Russ) is a 31 year old rapper with a story that inspired me.
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Russell Vitale (Russ) is a 31 year old rapper with a story that inspired me.
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My girlfriend is a huge fan, and after listening to his book “It’s all in your head” I can say I am as well.
Russ became famous because of delusional self belief, and being OK making songs no one thought were good for 10 years.
Russ has been actively pursuing a career in music since 2011, and didn’t “blow up” until 2015. In that time period he released around 90 songs, at one point one a week for a period of time.
The crazy part? He was independent. He wrote his own songs, he produced the beats, and even designed his own album covers.
He mastered “the game” and each of the skills required to blow up. He didn’t leave his success in the hands of anyone. His motto was “Fuck it, I’ll do it myself” which also ironically became one of the songs that made him famous.
The reason Russ became popular, and able to make music that moved many people was this : be delusional.
Like other great people throughout history such as Muhammad Ali: before he ever was, he spoke about himself as, and believed he was the “greatest”.
It wasn’t about arrogance, but about an unwavering belief that he would achieve his dreams. If he didn’t believe in himself, how could anyone else?
This world wants us to be small, and to trade in our dreams for a path of mediocrity. Fuck that. I believe we are all destined to do amazing things in the world. I am realizing the only thing that holds us back is ourselves.
Our unwillingness to be delusional… until one day we aren’t, and everything we have been envisioning manifests.
If you are reading this, I believe in you – now believe in your damn self.
Be delusional. Listen to the whisper inside you can’t quiet. Do the crazy shit you’re scared to speak out loud. Become the person you know you can be.
Something I am learning: It’s all in my head.
Here are my top takeaways from Russ’s book:
- Some people walk into situations with self doubt, others with delusional confidence: Either way it’s a choice.
- Fuck it, I’ll do it myself: The greater my understanding of the full scope of my career, the more I can accomplish.
- Self love grows in the garden of solitude: Be okay with being alone, and prioritize building the relationship with yourself.
- Trust the what, fuck the when, never forget the why: Stay focused on the vision (the what), let go of when I think it needs to happen (the when), remember why I started this in the first place (the why).
- Gratitude is your way of telling the universe “thank you I’ll have some more”: If you’re not grateful for the blessings you currently have, what makes you think you’ll get more? Celebrate what you want to see more of in your life.
I highly recommend you give it a read or listen. The biggest takeaway I received from this book?
I’m not as crazy as I thought, and everything I am asking for will happen. No exceptions.
How I recently failed: The past isn’t the present.
I realized recently I have been living in the past.
- “I was so muscular back then”.
- “I made $20k/month back then.”
- “I felt so happy at that time last year.”
The failure? What have you done lately, Riley?
The past can be a great teacher. It can also be a mirage.
It doesn’t matter what I’ve done, or who I’ve been. All that matters is who I am today, and what I’ve done “lately”.
I thought I was full, but then again maybe I needed some more humble pie.
How I recently won: Advice from the man that raised me.
I was able to spend a weekend with my Dad recently, which is a win in and of itself.
“The people you want to make proud, you will lose one day. Act accordingly.”
I value the time I get with my family, because I realize I will not have them forever. I’ve got a ticking clock to make the difference I know I will make in my family, and to soak up the wisdom, love, and memories.
After spending time with him, I put together a list of the best advice he has given me:
Don’t let others opinion steer your boat, they don’t even know where theirs is going.
I admire my Dad for his ability to beat to his own drum. How often do we let other people tell us what to do with our lives, when we don’t even want to live like them? To often. Steer your own boat.
Overachieving is sometimes just less goals and better plans. (to conquer the world conquer today)
Less is more. I tend to overwhelm myself with a lot of goals, and plans at once. My Dad recently gave me this advice, and it has been a huge perspective shift for me.
How many quality days do you get? As many as you decide to.
We are in complete control over the quality of our lives. That can be hard to hear when the world is weighing you down, and it’s the very thing that will free you. Decide that each day could be the best day of your life, because it’s all you got.
Story & lesson: Losing my brother (why did I start)
I’ve been reflecting recently on some life changing experiences. One of which was losing my brother Cortlin to heroin. I was 16, he was barely 19 years old.
He was my best friend, and understood me more than anyone. We used to talk about our lives in the future, and how awesome it would be to live a life that is like a movie. At the time it was more about who would have the hotter wife, or the faster car – but underneath all of that was a deeper reason.
We were a couple of kids, both dreaming of a brighter future. How could we step out of the dysfunction, and average way of living that is so normal in this world?
Did we really want to work for our whole lives, struggle with money, numb ourselves with substances or distractions, and look up one day with regret?
Before we could ever find out, Cortlin was given heroin by a family member… and the rest is history.
I still remember the rage, the sadness, and confusion. Life got real fast.
Next thing you know I was moving out on my own, and I made a vow to myself that I wouldn’t let his death be for nothing.
“Live through me” was later tattooed on my chest, and became my mission. How can I honor him, and live a life that would make both of our younger selves proud?
Earlier I mentioned “never forget the why”. I won’t.
Why do you want to get better? Who believed in you that you can’t let down? Who loses, if you don’t win?
Questions & Answers: How do I know what decision is right?
This weeks question comes from a long time friend, McKay Elliott.
“How do you know what decision is the right one to make?”
I’ve made a lot of large, and hard decisions in my life:
- Switching careers, while making $80k, now $200k+ /year.
- Ending a relationship after almost 8 years, and calling off an engagement
- Deciding to move across the country with nothing but belief in myself, and the desire to grow (coming soon)
Here are a few ways I feel into my decision making.
- The answer, is in the question: Ask myself questions, and answer them with brutal honesty. Self inquiry is a powerful tool.
- I am not alone: Talk to a higher power. I know there is a higher power, and I constantly check in with it to seek answers, and guidance. It always delivers.
- What am I afraid of?: Sometimes I do the thing I am most afraid of. That usually is an indicator I have growing to do and shows me where I am holding back out of fear.
Hope this helps my friend!
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In case you missed it: Why you don’t achieve your goals.
In Saturdays Issue, I covered Why you aren’t achieving your goals.
Just like a recipe for a meal, ingredients matter. There are 3 ingredients needed to achieve your goals.
Do you ever cook with a recipe, and leave out 1/3rd of the ingredients? I didn’t think so.
Read that issue here, or download the free guide I made for it.
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With love, support, & gratitude,
Riley Conder
“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” – Confucius
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