Happy Birthday (rest in peace)
Read Time: 3 Minutes
“Get inspired and transform your mindset in three minutes or less.”
Welcome to 3 Minute Thursdays, my weekly newsletter to give you quick, actionable insights and reflections to speed up your personal growth, break the cycle of the past, and overcome limiting beliefs. You are a powerful creator, time to act like it.
What you can expect today:
- Riley’s Raw Thoughts: Hanging with celebrities and ex-NFL players
- Story & Lesson: Happy birthday, and rest in peace
- Questions & Answers: What would they say?
Riley’s Raw Thoughts: Hanging with celebrities and ex-NFL players
Something on my mind & heart:
The last 10-14 days have stretched me.
- I moved across the country to Austin, Texas.
- I canoed 60+ miles on the Colorado river in Moab, Utah.
- I launched a real estate school.
Plus a lot of other things behind the scenes.
Today I feel like reflecting on what I learned from my river trip – specifically from being around certain people that a lot of people “look up to”.
I spent 3 days with a group of around 30 men, and the majority of them were total bad asses.
- Ex-NFL players.
- Black Belt Jiu Jitsu Atheletes.
- Multi-Millionaires.
- Celebrities.
I don’t say that to brag, because honestly I have realized that these people are mostly regular, and ordinary.
I say it to paint a picture:
Don’t put people on a pedestal.
I’ve learned a powerful lesson the last few years as I have networked with powerful people :
“Treat people like a celebrity, and you’ll get treated like a fan.”
It’s simultaneously inspiring, humbling, and comical to be around these type of people.
They are people. Like you, like me. Flawed, hard working, and driven to succeed.
They didn’t quit, and stayed committed to their vision.
The only person to put on a pedestal is ourselves.
Only then, can we become recognized by others.
A few other lessons I learned from this group:
- “I am a winner. I don’t lose, I pivot” – Ex-NFL player that won a superbowl with the Patriots
- Being successful doesn’t solve all of your problems.
- Nothing is permanent, you gotta earn it every single day.
What I am building & learning:
Currently I am building out the series of retreats I am running this year and moving forwards.
I have one for Men coming soon called The Rite of Passage.
Another in the near future called “Sacred Synergy” for Men and Women.
And lastly, one for Women coming soon. Name TBD.
I am learning:
- Running live events is part of my calling, and that it’s harder than you’d think.
- The world is craving community, and connection more than ever.
- Trust in the process of creating something from nothing.
If you are interested in learning more about my retreats, click the button below.
How I recently won & failed:
I recently won by staying true to myself in the face of resistance, and opposition for my long term vision.
As I’ve said on previous letters, no one will bet on you like you will.
I recently failed by playing small.
I would be lying if I didn’t say I am pretty damn scared.
Don’t get me wrong, I am taking action regardless but holy hell there is a lot of change in my life at the moment.
It’s easy to get in our own way, and to hold ourselves back in light of that:
- Procrastination
- Self Doubt
- Validation Seeking
The important thing is to be aware of it, and to keep moving forward.
Story & Lesson: Bet on yourself, no one else will
When I was 16 years old my brother Cortlin passed away, today would’ve been his birthday.
He had been addicted to heroin since around age 15/16, and had relapsed after my family fell apart during the divorce of our parents.
That experience sent me on a warpath. I was now living on my own, and tossed into a rage fueled path of purpose.
I remember when we were kids we would talk about being the ones in our family to change everything.
- Make more money than we knew what to do with, and support our family.
- Become famous, and make a positive impact on the world.
- Marry a couple of hotties, and build a strong family.
- Stop the cycles of chaos we saw growing up.
Unfortunately, the same things we dreamed of avoiding ended up taking his life.
Six years ago I had “Live through me” tattooed over my heart.
People often ask me why I do what I do, and what has made me overcome so much.
Cortlin is a large part, and my desire to live a life in honor of him that is massive.
I will achieve everything we talked about as kids, and more.
I am helping the people like us in the world.
I can’t, and won’t give up.
Here are a few memories we had together:
- In high school I beat the living Shit out of a kid that was trying to mess with him. Good times.
- Riding dirt bikes everyday after school in the field behind our house. Nostalgic.
- Distracting a guy on a beach cruiser in California, and watching him crash. We were little shits.
Happy Birthday big brother!
Questions & Answers: What would they say?
This last week on my trip I was talking to one of the guys who was struggling with some life decisions.
- Do I move out of my home state, or stay?
- Break up with my girlfriend, or not?
- Do I quit my job, or stay?
I’ve learned that “coaching” isn’t about giving advice… it’s asking questions and helping someone find their own answers.
So, this week I want to give you a practice I do with my clients.
Think of someone you really admire, or even a future version of yourself.
Ask yourself, what are the 3 things they would recommend I do in my life at the moment?
For this guy, here’s how that went.
- They would tell me to move.
- They would tell me to break up with my girlfriend.
- They would tell me to double down on my career, and move positions in the company.
Hope it helps you, like it has for me and others.
Reply to this email with a question if you want to be featured on my newsletter and get some 1on1 advice.
In Case You Missed It:
In Saturdays Issue, I covered the science of success and how your mind works for or against you.
It’s probably my favorite I have written to date!
You can read it here.
Calling all the free thinkers: Join the others like you
Humans need each other, we grow and thrive when we have a tribe.
Unfortunately men & women nowadays are suffering in silence…
To many people are being “lone wolves” in their lives.
The thing about the lone wolf?
It starves, and dies alone.
That doesn’t have to be you.
That’s why I am building Break The Cycle: the #1 tribe for “the ones” ready to break free from their past so they can build themselves a brighter future, and become their highest self against all odds.
I will help you to identify, and overcome your core limiting belief, and self sabotage so you can double your earning potential WITHOUT needing expensive education, or therapy.
Break the cycles in your life from your family, childhood, culture, and even your own mind.
You were born for this.
See you on the inside.
When you’re ready, here are 3 ways I can help you:
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You can reply directly to this email with any questions, wins, or thoughts you had this week.
Thank you for joining me this week.
With love, support, & gratitude,
Riley Conder
“It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” – Confucius
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